MetroRiderLA

Image courtesy of Pragmagraphr.

I went and rode the bus.

In an attempt to resuscitate the winter flu season in the SoCal heat of July, Metro has amped up the A/Cs to Day After Tomorrow levels. I’m usually a prepared traveler and have my back pack with zip up in tow at all times, however last night was laundry day and I forgot to restock my day pack.

Now I shouldn’t complain too much, I’m sure peeps about to get their houses burned out because of fires would love an over productive A/C right about now (though perhaps all those over productive A/Cs caused these fires in the first place-eeeek). But even they probably stop blowing the A/C on full when it reaches slow-the-blood-circulation levels. No I didn’t get frostbite but the tingle in the throat and mega cough were evident by trips end.

Then again, perhaps it was the top volume Transit TV that was sending my immune system into a tailspin, throwing me to the mercy of American Latino TV. The conspiracy theorist in me says that the busses are pumping up the A/C in cooperation with the drug companies whose advertisements are blaring at top volume from the plastic bound TVs, but my theory holds no water after failing to log a single cold/flu advertisement while riding. Though whose to say it’s not the debt consolidation people behind it all. Wasn’t there a study by the New England Journal of Medicine that proved sick people are 5 times more likely to screw themselves into high interest loans? Had something to do with slowed neuron reactions. Which means it’s not entirely unfounded to believe it was Metro and other transit agencies that caused the mortgage bubble in the first place and they’re now paying Libertarian think tanks to spew such “radical” ideas that it’s the Federal Reserve’s fault.

Or perhaps I’m just freezing and annoyed by the loud TV and wish I hadn’t forgot my damn sweatshirt. In either case, I’m coughing again and I haven’t a single drug commercial to tell me what to do. Thanks for nothing, Metro.

Though a near impossibility to believe, it seems Metro is taking some pages from other transit agency’s playbooks across the globe. No they’re not embracing the subway to the sea or pink line or green to the airport or this or that like they should, but in advertising they’re scratching the surface.

One thing I’ve certainly noticed when visiting other cities and nations (London, Paris, Montreal, among others) they take advertising to another level. While LA is stuck back in the print age these other transit agencies are keeping with the times and digitizing their advertising for more flash, more creativity and, one must assume, more money. The closest thing Metro has is the obtrusive and annoying Transit TV, which has improved to include large corps like Wamu, Coke, and NBC, but the brunt of it is still just low yield cell phone ring tone and debt consolidation commercials.

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It’s a rare occurrence to find a bus stop with a bench and rarer still to find one with a shelter so when one no longer exists the mourning is all the worse. Like losing a baby panda or white Bengal Tiger, the community can’t help but be taken aback by such a tragedy. First there’s the confusion, then there’s the depression and soon after the anger. Right now I’m currently in the anger phase.

Last week as I strolled to my bus stop I noticed yellow tape all over the place. Some people were hanging out dissecting in Spanish the reason and though I speak Spanish about as well as a first year student—I can name all things kitchen related—I didn’t need much to figure it out. The east end of the shelter was destuctibled and the old bus sign had been replaced

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When it’s been 40 minutes do you hold your breath and go against all your low expectations of Metro to wait it out for that next Rapid? Or do you give in to failure and hop on the local? This question as old as time was posed this very morning while I fruitlessly waited on the often-maligned 714.

I only have to take this bus once a week but even that little bit gets under my skin. The true problem of the 714 lies in the fact that it only runs during “rush hour” which, according to Metro, stops at about 8:30am and 5:30pm. Now Metro may not say that but if one were to look at their “rush hour only” service they would see that the last busses during that period run much of their line well before rush hour is even close to being over. The 714 is no different. West bound or east bound, stops are past for the last time at 5:15pm and its no different in the morning. Busses are non existent after 8:45am and the only thing you can hope for is that the bus is running late, an insane proposition for fellow Metroriders but true all the same.

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The endless lights of a passing car dealership that can’t help but block out the sky. Photo courtesy of jon_zuckerman.

On a recent trip to some old stomping grounds in Louisville, Kentucky I had an epiphany. I was at the airport waiting for a friend to pick me up when a brand new, shiny green, Honda Civic pulled up. It was a nice car, as cars go—sunroof and all that jazz—but what really caught my attention was the temporary dealership license plate. In black and silver it read Sam Swope and I immediately became nostalgic. Why, I wasn’t sure, but I definitely knew I was back in Louisville for the name was as familiar to me as my friend’s who I’d be staying with.

I continued to wait and continued to ponder how crazy and all encompassing the car culture really is. I hadn’t need for convincing or anything, but to realize that a gigantic car dealership was as recognizable as Churchill Downs really blew me away. I then got to thinking about the other places I’ve lived or family has lived and tested if other such dealerships were locked in my memory like my first tree fort and kiss. Monroe, Ct – Dan Perkins, Tampa, Fl - Furman, Tallahassee, Fl - Proctor, Chicago, Il – Gillespie Motors, Ottawa, Il – Bill Walsh, Los Angeles, CA - Galpin Motors.

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This morning I had the unfortunate destiny to trek along the Wilshire corridor. At all times I try my best to stay off this God-forsaken street but today was just not possible. But my goal was Westwood so I felt good that I could at least use the 920 express. I know it’s not really all that much faster because B Hills is clogged at all times but fewer stops lowers the percentage rate of the guy that won’t stop sneezing to board.

Accepting my Wilshire fate I took the Red line to Wilshire/Vermont with the hopes of catching a 920 and sailing smoothly to Bruin country.  However, I had the regrettable fortune of forgetting it was Earth day. But, happy to see that the city is promoting the de-caring of LA even if for only a single day I ignored the precarious re-routing situation sure to follow.

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