I Drove Today

Photo courtesy of ballookey via Flickr.

I don’t feel so good.

You see, today, for the first time in months, I drove. A car. Do I feel bad because I went against the ideals of the “public transit lifestyle” by driving a car today? No. Do I feel bad because transit-dependent people in this city can’t experience the freedom of being behind the wheel of their own personal transportation device? Hell no. I feel bad for one reason and one reason only: I drove.

And driving, in this city at least, SUCKS.

Here’s the story, as it unfolded. I had another meeting today in Culver City. If you’re a regular reader you know I sometimes have to go the Culver City for business meetings, and I typically take the 439 Express to get there. The bus driver of the 439 hates me for some reason and loves to yell at me. On this fateful day I decided that instead of taking the 439 to Culver City I would take out one of my trusty Flexcar’s, a lovely silver 2007 Honda Civic Hybrid parked at 11th and Grand in Downtown L.A. Why? Maybe I wanted to avoid the inevitable berating from my favorite bus driver, or maybe I secretely wanted to experience the “freedom” of being behind the wheel, or, more likely, I’m a masochist. Either way, with a quick online reservation, a short walk, and a swipe of my Smartcard I was behind the wheel of my own vroom-vroom machine. No one was going to yell at me, I didn’t have to adhere to any schedules, I could turn up my music as loud as I wanted to, and by God I was just free to do whatever the hell I pleased. I turned the key and let that half gas/half battery powered beast purr and then… I was off.

Those of you who drive on a daily basis… I have the utmost respect for you. You deal with the stuff of nightmares. Not since I last drove have I felt so angry, so depressed, so annoyed, so dirty, so close to tears. I contemplated suiced. I found myself saying “Are you fucking kidding me??” more than I’ve said in the last 3 years. I could have lost my life, or at least been seriously hurt, at one intersection. I can’t remember the last time I was so hateful of other members of the human race. “What the fuck do you think you’re doing asshole???” “Learn to driver fucker.” “Oh my god. Are you fucking retarded??” Those words and more went through my head on this little joy ride. At one point I found myself at a very busy intersection with many traffic lights. Oddly enough, the traffic lights were acting more like stop signs, simply flashing red, instead of the normal red, yellow, green. This caused problems. These problems caused me to get angry and say more bad words.

At one point I had to put gasoline into the car. It has been a long long time since I have done this. I forgot how much I hate gas stations. There were about 102,214 cars at the station when I arrived, most just parked in front of the pumps as their drivers filled up on Ding-Dongs and Red Bulls in the convenience store. This caused anger. Once a pump was finally made available I found myself face to face with something more annoying than TransitTV. That’s right… NBC @ THE PUMP. Are you fucking kidding me? I wanted to light a match and set the whole place and my life ablaze. I’ve never had any murderous suicidal thoughts while on the bus… at worst I get a good chuckle.

Given the choice between a urine soaked scratchiti filled bus that stops on every goddamn street corner with a bus driver that demeans me like a bastard puppy who just peed the rug and driving myself around L.A. on Friday afternoon… I’d take the former anyday.

Thank God I’m transit-dependent. I’m not usually very religous either, but boy what some driving will do to a man!